Hi Kim, it's me, God!

Well, after a month of praying and thinking about submission, I realize that I have a long ways to go. Sometimes it's hard for me to know where God wants me and what He wants me to do....and other times I know exactly what to do, but I just don't want to. It's so hard to give up that desire to be in control and have your own way. What a blessing it is to put others before yourself. I pray 2011 will be the year of OTHERS for me. I'm so sick of my self-obsessed nature. Jesus commanded us to love the Lord our God AND love our neighbors as ourselves. I have not done either well. I am earnestly seeking for God to transform my heart to love like Him.

It was interesting to focus more on how I treated others this month. I was surprised (and saddened) to see how often I chose myself over others. I also saw this horrible habit rear its ugly head when I was home with my family. Why is it so much easier to treat others with kindness and patience, but turn around and treat your own family horribly. I know I need to show my family more love and respect. I mean, no offense to anyone else, but I have the best family EVER! Seriously. Your parents may be alright, but mine are the BEST! :) I realize more and more each day how blessed I am to have them and my younger brother. I ask for God to help show me where I need to "grow up" in regards to my relationship with them. I love you Mama and Daddy and Mark!

God really revealed to me how he wants to change my life. In many ways. Now I have a lifetime to tackle them, but I know He wants me to get started....uhh, TODAY! I wanted to share the main ones with you that I felt God reveal to me this month.

1. GET HEALTHY! - As I told you a few months ago, my cholesterol was way too high. I recently got the results from my recent blood work back and my cholesterol went down 30 points! HOORAY! Now, I am in the normal level BUT my HDL (good cholesterol) is way to low and my LDL (bad) is WAY WAY too high. I want to continue to make healthier eating choices and I want to get into a CONSISTENT workout routine. I have made a goal to lose 15 pounds by August (maid of honor time! haha) I want to get back to my college weight. High school weight seems to lofty haha! I'll keep you updated on how that's going!

2. STUDY HIS WORD - I just finished reading the Bible through for the 2nd time, but I honestly feel like I retained nothing. I got into the bad habit of not reading for a few months and then reading HUGE chunks at a time to catch up. I want to continue to reading the Bible in a year, but I want to actually read small amounts each day so I actually retain something! :)

3. INTIMACY WITH GOD - This is one God has been trying to work with me on for...umm...FOREVER! My prayer life is well, inconsistent and usually involves despair. I want to meet with God in times of gladness and sadness. In an effort to help me along, I got a gratitude prayer journal. My plan is start out with once a week and hopefully work up to daily.

4. GIVE UP CONTROL - Yeah, I tend to give God control on "some" things in my life, but not others....one BIG one in particular (relationships)....

Well, my friends. I hope you had a wonderful New Year's Eve and I look forward to sharing more of my journey in 2011. I will be back soon to tell you about January's discipline-STUDY! :) (the nerd in me is super excited about this month!)